My Majic Family

Familiarity
Considerable acquaintance with.
Established friendship; intimacy.
An excessively familiar or informal act; an impropriety.
The quality or condition of being familiar.
familiarity
n 1: personal knowledge or information about someone or something [syn: acquaintance, conversance, conversancy] 2: usualness by virtue of being familiar or well known [ant: unfamiliarity] 3: close or warm friendship; "the absence of fences created a mysterious intimacy in which no one knew privacy" [syn: intimacy, closeness] 4: a casual manner [syn: casualness] 5: an act of undue intimacy [syn: impropriety, indecorum, liberty]

Just about everyday I take my kids to the park. No, I am not trying to win mother of the year or anything I just feel it helps them burn off steam and behave better plus it's great exercise. Anyway, I am a people watcher and as I look around I see ALL kinds of people. For the most part it's women since that seems to be in our job description -MOM- cook, clean, take the kids to the park. Almost every time I go there are always groups of them just standing around talking, they know each others kids and you can tell they know each other well and are comfortable. I am almost always there alone since well you know, just moved and all so I don't really know anyone yet. It's fine *sniff sniff* it really doesn't bother me. Well, today it bothered me. The park was really quiet and there was only one other family for the longest time. Then this one group of people got there and another group and they were all greeting each other with hugs and how are yous and I started to feel really sad. I miss my little group of friends back home. I miss standing around and gabbing while our kids played, I miss lunches at each others homes, I miss their kids knowing and trusting me, I miss our kids being able to play together, I miss being able to watch them grow up and I miss tea every afternoon with Jeanette, I miss knowing everyone every where I go but the thing is lunches and gabbing at the park can be replaced. What I am so desperately lonely for is the familiarity. My heart is literally hurting right now to have that back. I need friendships that are lifelong, friendships with refrigerator rights (probably just a handful of you will get that) friendships that are give and take. And the truth of the matter is...I don't want to start again. It's so much work and anyone who knows me knows I poured every ounce of love and strength I had in making those ones back home what they were I don't think I want to do it again. There are very few Jeanette's, Lisa's or Barb's just to name a few in this world and I can't think anyone would ever even come remotely close. Please don't misunderstand, I am happy. God has done such amazing things for us and we have come so much further since moving here, it's really incredible but there are lots of times I would be so happy to pack it all up and move back b/c to me there is nothing more important than amazing people in your life who are there for you and visa versa, who you see yourself still hanging out with 20 years down the road. Who's kid's graduation and wedding you will attend and yes I know I can still do that but there is nothing like knowing that kid the whole time instead of showing up and your friend having to say "Don't you remember them? You used to play with their boys." You know this is probably just a rough day and we all have them but please pray for that peace. God hasn't done all this to not also provide amazing Godly people as friends. He knows our needs and I am confident that as my mother always said " This too shall pass." Thanks for reading and any encouragement would be greatly appreciated.

Posted by The Mac Fam on Saturday, January 21, 2006 at 4:43 PM | Permalink